One of the threads on Linked In is fuhkoktuh. My buddy Lin said the issue just only on that thread. He
said he thought I would blame him for the problem. I told him my paranoia is
much wider and in fact i blamed veteran character actor J.K. Simmons for it.
So...I thought maybe I should start and begin to ruin a new thread.
So this piece is about computer technology and old
farts like me and fellow old-farts-well-met like Chris and Linton and Tim.
Chris said he hated new technology when he doesn’t
understand it. Agreed.
Here’s my theory. The fault dear Brutus is not in
ourselves, but in the idiots who write instructions about installing and
working with new technology
I actually installed a router once. I could do it
BECAUSE THE INSTRUCTIONS WERE BRILLIANT.
It took only one clarification phone call, picked
up on the first ring. The guy’s name at the other end was not "Trey"
and he did not have an accent that made it seem like everything would be allright,
when in fact it never was. This guy answered my question clearly. I was not
told to go to some Freakin’ FAQ thread were idiots like me who are confused
come up with wrong answers for other idiots like me.
All us old farts require is logical, linear,
sensible directions. And maybe a nice glass tea.
The instruction that got me most was when I needed
a new keyboard. I bought a new one and rented a laser cutter to burn through
the Plexiglas -strength plastic wrap it came in.
Instructions said to insert the installation CD
that came with my keyboard, and detach my old keyboard and mouse. I did that. Then
of course I could not go on to the next instruction on the CD because I HAD NO
FREAKING KEYBOARD OR MOUSE!!
THE YOUNG PUNKS UNDERSTAND WHAT TO DO IN THAT
SITUATION.
FORTUNATELY I DID TOO. I BRIBED ONE OF MY GROWNUP SONS TO COME OVER AND INSTALL
IT.
And why the HELL is the tally light
so goddam tiny and out of my sight line so I don't know I've locked my caps
which I do often because I'm a shitty typist?
Now I want to do an audio book.
record it myself. I dread figuring out how to do it and get it distributed. Halp!
Now, iof uyou’ll excuse me, I’m gonna go listen by golden
oldie by that dead astronaut, Neil Young: “Helpless, HelplesS, HELPLESS.
